I’m sure all us Instagramers know the reality! We post all the good things up and leave the bad out… We try and make our lives look as good as we can. But that’s not the truth…there’s a lot more happening behind the screens… I get too many messages or people coming up to me saying how ‘lucky I am’ and sometimes I want to just scream… There’s more to everything I do and have than just luck…so I thought I would explain the negatives …
As some of you may know, I came back from my journey in France a few weeks ago, after spending time with my family and friends! In one of my earlier posts I mentioned goodbyes don’t get easier..you just get used to them! Well basically, two weeks ago my aunt and uncle (from my mums side, so France) flew over to Ireland to visit us! Sadly, they are going back to France tomorrow. I have been dreading this all day.
I don’t know how many messages I’ve gotten from friends and family the past few years saying how ‘lucky’ I am for various things. Travel & relationships are definitely the two biggest ones.
Of course I am super grateful for having the chance to travel and be in a nice relationship but there’s always so much more to it. Sometimes you need to experience it yourself to really feel how hard it is!
Having 3 nationalities
I understand why people would think being half chinese, half french and then living in Ireland is cool but I’m certainly not ‘lucky’. I have to deal with goodbyes more than anyone would want to. Half of my family is in Hong Kong and my other half in France. (Parents and brother in Ireland). Of course I feel lucky to be able to go to Hong Kong and France but I haven’t seen my dads side in 11 years… And as I just mentioned earlier, my family are going back to France..
I don’t have the money or time to be going to Hong Kong and France often.. It is much more harder and complicated than buying tickets and flying over! Having family that lifes so far away comes with time differences.. Today, I was trying to message my uncle and it was around 7pm..and it was 3am where he was! The whole family was asleep! I can’t even remember the last time we spoke!
I loveee travelling and I’m so happy I am allowed to travel alone at my age and have such great experiences! I love meeting new people and learning new languages and am happy I can make good use out of my skills! But to many people, that’s all there is to it. They don’t see the amount of work and effort I put into, to save money and plan my trips. It took me three years to save up to go back to France this Summer.. Three years! Only for two weeks….and then I have to say goodbye to all the people I love and fly back to another country…that is super super difficult. Of course I spend a lot of time crying and many people try to ‘comfort’ me by saying ‘it wont be forever’ or ‘you can still still talk to them’. There is nothing worse than saying that… It doesn’t matter if it’s not forever… It’s still gut wrenching.
I spend hours writing and learning new languages in order to be able to work and travel in different countries. At the moment I’m learning Russian in the hopes I can work there soon one day… People are always fascinated by the amount of languages I can speak but they don’t understand how many hours of work I put into… What I sacrifice to do what I do.
The distance is horrible…I can’t be with the people I love… I can’t get involved in what they’re doing such as clubs or outings or celebrations! I have to see all of that through pictures I get sent via whatsapp…
Like I said…it took me three years to save up… People forget the effort and time I put in to save up! I try and spend as little as I can but it can be hard. I know I’m 16..but because I have money, if there’s something like food or clothes or anything I need or want, I have to get it which means less money for me to use for travel. I have so many responsibilities. I worked many jobs and one treated me awfully. I had to put up with working for hours and not even getting paid in the end (I auit the job of course..) Money doesn’t magically grow on trees (unless you play Animal Crossing😉).
Friends around the world
I love my friends and I’m happy to meet them… Recently my friend in Israel wanted me to fly and see him as he just graduated..but with my age, money and time, I simply cannot. Situations like these happen so often..I can’t be with them…I can’t create memories with them either… But somehow people overlook all of this?!
(I AM GRATEFUL FOR EVERYTHING, BUT I JUST WANT TO SHOW PEOPLE THE OTHER SIDE OF THE SITUATION..I KNOW THIS IS NEGATIVE BUT I AM TRULY HAPPY…THERES JUST A LOT OF HARD THINGS TO DEAL WITH TOO)
But this is where friends and family around me come in. They might’nt always understand how I feel..but they are always there for me and my closest friends will always know how difficult life can be for me…nothing and noone is perfect..
I hope more people realise the amount of work people put into making things possible..and at my age and with what I have achieved, I can happily say that I’m proud😊